To understand "Daraba", let the Quran define it

 

Before we accept what "daraba" (ضرب) means in verse 4:34, we should first ask:

 

How does God use this word elsewhere in the Quran?

 

The word daraba appears in various forms  54 times throughout the Quran, with multiple meanings, depending on context. 

 

Here’s a breakdown of those meanings:

Let this table speak for itself.

 

The Quran overwhelmingly uses daraba  ضرب to describe non-violent, symbolic, or abstract actions. Only a small fraction refer to striking, and those are never within the context of relationships, homes and certainly not marriages.

 

Lane’s Lexicon: 

Let us now turn to one of the most authoritative sources in Arabic-English scholarship: Lane’s Lexicon.

 

According to Lane’s Lexicon entry on daraba, the word is multifaceted, and its interpretation must depend entirely on context.

 

 

• To strike, beat, smite 
• To set forth (a parable). Frequently used when God "sets forth" an example or analogy.
• To travel or go forth. "Striking the earth" is an idiom for journeying or traveling.
• To separate, part, distance. In some usages, it refers to separation or disconnection.
• To cover or veil. 
• To avoid, ignore, turn away from. Used when turning attention away from something or someone.
• To make a mark or impression. Symbolic or metaphorical, such as imprinting or stamping.

 

This means “strike” is just one of many potential meanings, and not even the most common.  

 

So… How do we know which meaning is correct?

 

For believers who follow the Quran alone, that context can’t come from cultural tradition or inherited interpretations. It must come from the Quran itself - from how God defines relationships, justice, and mercy throughout the text.

 

Let’s ask:

 

1. What kind of relationships does God want between men and women?
2. What are we told about forgiveness, restraint, and compassion?
3. How does the Quran say we should interpret its verses?

To understand “Daraba,” We must understand how the Quran handles marital conflict

 

Before we interpret a single word; especially one as controversial as daraba, we must ask:

What does the Quran say about how to handle marital disputes as a whole?

 

Because God does not leave us in the dark. The Quran lays out a clear, compassionate, step-by-step path for when tension arises between spouses. And when we look at this path, the idea of “beating” simply doesn’t fit.

 

Let’s walk through that divine process.

 

1. Begin with advice and open communication

As for those females from whom you fear rebellion, then you shall advise them. Quran 4:34

 

 

2. If the issue persists, create emotional space

 ,abandon them in bed. Quran 4:34

 

 

3. Then... adribuhhunna [ daraba - ضرب ]

But what does that mean? Does it really mean to strike?

Or could it mean what it often means in the Quran: to part ways, to separate, to walk away?

 

 

4. Still unresolved? Call for help, fairly and equally.

And if you fear a permanent rift between them, then send a judge from his family and a judge from her family. If they want to reconcile, then God will bring them together. God is Knowledgeable, Expert. Quran 4:35

A balanced, community-driven effort at reconciliation.

 

 

5. If reconciliation fails, initiate divorce, but not hastily.

... Do not expel them from their homes...  Quran 65:1

Those who wish to separate from their wives shall wait four months. If they reconsider, then indeed, God is Forgiver, Merciful. Quran 2:226

 

 

6. Reconciliation is still open during this time.

The divorce may occur twice. So, either they remain together equitably, or part ways with goodness. And it is not permissible for you to take back anything you have given them unless you fear that they will not uphold the boundaries of God. Quran 2:229

 

 

7. If they still wish to part ways, the divorce must be finalized with two witnesses.

Then, once the interim is fulfilled, either you remain together equitably, or part ways equitably and have it witnessed by two just people from among you; and give the testimony for God. This is to enlighten those who believe in God and the Last Day. 

And whoever reverences God, He will create a solution for him. Quran 65:3 

 

 

By following this path, the Quran ensures that:

1. Emotions do not drive injustice
2. Decisions are made slowly and deliberately
3. Space is created for healing or parting with dignity
4. Power is checked through community involvement
5. Women are not left voiceless or unprotected

 

This is not a framework that endorses violence.

It is a divine design for restraint, fairness, and mercy.

 

So when we arrive at daraba in 4:34, the context tells us exactly what kind of act belongs there:

A non-violent, transitional step, consistent with everything before and after it.

 

Quran 39:18 — The Quran’s standard for interpretation

 

Those who listen to the Word and follow the best of it, these are the ones God has guided, and they are the people of understanding.

Quran 39:18

 

This verse gives us a method: when the Quran presents multiple possibilities, we are to follow the best meaning, the one most consistent with God's broader message.

 

So what does the Quran define as "best"?

 

And not equal are good and evil. You shall resort to the one which is better. Thus, the one who used to be your enemy, may become your best friend.

Quran 41:34

 

And if a woman fears from her husband rebellion or disregard, then there is no sin upon them to find a solution of reconciliation between themselves; and reconciliation is best. And the souls are brought by need; and if you are kind and do right, then God is expert over what you do.

Quran  4:128

 

Kind words and forgiveness are far better than a charity that is followed by harm. God is Rich, Compassionate. 

Quran 2:263

 

And let not those among you who have been given provision and abundance refuse to give to the relatives, and the needy, and those who have immigrated in the cause of God. Let them pardon and forgive. Would you not like God to forgive you? And God is Forgiving, Merciful.

Quran 24:22

 

So, either they remain together equitably, or part ways with goodnes.

Quran 2:229

 

 

Now ask: in light of these verses, which is the "best" meaning of daraba in 4:34?

 

Is it to "strike" or to "separate," "walk away," "turn aside"?

 

When a word carries multiple meanings, and only one aligns with the Quran’s moral framework, Quran 39:18 commands us to choose that one.